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Science Forum Index » Mechanics Forum » OT: The Designer from Hell
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| Rich Grise |
 Posted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 2:33 pm |
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Gag received from a coworker:
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The designer sat at his drafting board
A wealth of knowledge in his head was stored.
Like "what can be done on a radial drill
Or a turret lathe or a vertical mill?"
But above all things a knack he had
Of driving gentle machinists mad.
So he mused as he thoughtfully scratched his bean,
"Just how can I make this thing hard to machine?
"If I make this perfect body straight
The job had oughta come out first rate.
But 'twould be be so easy to turn and bore
That it would never make a macninist sore.
"So I'll put a compound taper there
And a couple of angles to make them swear,
And brass could work for this little gear
But it's too namned easy to work I fear.
"So just to make the machinist squeal
I'll make him mill it from tungsten steel.
And I'll put these holes that hold the cap
Down underneath where they can't be tapped.
"Now if they can make this it'll just be luck
'Cause it can't be held by dog or chuck
And it can't be planed and it can't be ground
So I feel my design is unusually sound."
And he shouted in glee, "Success at at last!
This goddamn thing can't even be cast!".
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Cheers!
Rich |
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| Eeyore |
| Posted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 2:49 pm |
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Rich Grise wrote:
Quote: Gag received from a coworker:
Just what is it with people who ork cows ?
Graham |
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| Don Bowey |
| Posted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 3:39 pm |
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On 4/28/08 12:49 PM, in article 48162A2E.845EBBE9@hotmail.com, "Eeyore"
<rabbitsfriendsandrelations@hotmail.com> wrote:
Quote:
Rich Grise wrote:
Gag received from a coworker:
Just what is it with people who ork cows ?
Graham
Nothing much, but they must do it during a full moon.
Heland coos are exempt. |
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| sprocket |
| Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 1:53 am |
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Don Bowey wrote:
Quote: Heland coos are exempt.
Though they may be beaten with acoustic. |
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| Guest |
| Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 3:05 am |
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On Apr 28, 3:33 pm, Rich Grise <r...@example.net> wrote:
Quote: Gag received from a coworker:
--------------------------------------------------------
The designer sat at his drafting board
A wealth of knowledge in his head was stored.
Like "what can be done on a radial drill
Or a turret lathe or a vertical mill?"
But above all things a knack he had
Of driving gentle machinists mad.
So he mused as he thoughtfully scratched his bean,
"Just how can I make this thing hard to machine?
"If I make this perfect body straight
The job had oughta come out first rate.
But 'twould be be so easy to turn and bore
That it would never make a macninist sore.
"So I'll put a compound taper there
And a couple of angles to make them swear,
And brass could work for this little gear
But it's too namned easy to work I fear.
"So just to make the machinist squeal
I'll make him mill it from tungsten steel.
And I'll put these holes that hold the cap
Down underneath where they can't be tapped.
"Now if they can make this it'll just be luck
'Cause it can't be held by dog or chuck
And it can't be planed and it can't be ground
So I feel my design is unusually sound."
And he shouted in glee, "Success at at last!
This goddamn thing can't even be cast!".
--------------------------------------------------------
Cheers!
Rich
But 'tho the designer gloated turgidly-
He forgot about powder metallurgy.
Dave |
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| Don Bowey |
| Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 11:32 am |
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On 4/28/08 11:53 PM, in article fv6gmc$9k$1@aioe.org, "sprocket"
<jas@spam.cop.uk> wrote:
Quote: Don Bowey wrote:
Heland coos are exempt.
Though they may be beaten with acoustic.
But only if acoustic doesn't touch acoustic nerve. Very bad if it does. |
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| Jeff Liebermann |
| Posted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 12:01 pm |
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On Mon, 28 Apr 2008 19:33:01 GMT, Rich Grise <rich@example.net> wrote:
Quote: "Just how can I make this thing hard to machine?
(...)
Perfect timing...
I'm working on a 20MBytes IGES file, for a local machine shop, that
crashes or hangs SmartCAM while trying to import it. Considering that
it's a rectangular flat plate with only about 18 holes, there's no way
it should be 22MBloats big. I guessed wrong that the IGES file was
corrupted or something, but it passes all the sanity checks. Then, I
noticed that the ace designer doesn't believe in drilling
approximately 0.5" round holes. Instead, he uses a 0.125" mill, to
mill out the holes, in what looks like 0.0001" steps. Kinda looks
like something that was shoved through a machine specific post
processor, and then converted back to IGES. Retch.
The evil thing to do would be to manually generate the corrected IGES
file, drill the part, but not tell the original designer. This is a
prototype that will soon be sent out for quotes. When the other
vendors (and competitors) get the original 20MByte file, there will
surely be some rather interesting telephone dialogs. I'm tempted.
--
Jeff Liebermann jeffl@cruzio.com
150 Felker St #D http://www.LearnByDestroying.com
Santa Cruz CA 95060 http://802.11junk.com
Skype: JeffLiebermann AE6KS 831-336-2558 |
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