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Science Forum Index » Psychology Forum » She said, it just wasn't important any more."
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| JP |
 Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 7:50 am |
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From Newsletter:
An EFT expert beautifully weaves EFT within her client's pain, panic
and molestation--success across the board
Note: This article assumes you have a working knowledge of EFT.
Newcomers can still learn from it but are advised to get our Free EFT
Get Started Package or our Affordable DVDs for a more complete
understanding.
Hi Everyone,Study this insightful case by Aileen Nobles and learn how
the "EFT Art of Delivery" can transform a client. Near the end of her
well written article Aileen says this about her client, "In her next
session she mentioned that she had not experienced any breathing
problems, and could hardly be bothered to think about the
molestations. She said it just wasn't important any more."
Hugs, Gary
By Aileen Nobles
Hi Gary,
It was very rewarding to see these changes take place as EFT
neutralized the painful memories of family sexual abuse. When
"Angela" first contacted me she was incapacitated with pain in her arm
and shoulder, and also suffered from panic attacks along with a
feeling of helplessness. The panic attacks were accompanied by her
inability to take a deep breath.
When she first started with me she was aware that something happened
when she was young but it was blanked out when she tried to recall the
situations. She knew it was connected to her cousin, as she would get
sick to her stomach if she had to see him. We started tapping.
Even though I don't know what happened I'm quite wonderful anyway...
Even though I know it was bad...
Even though I'm too scared to remember, perhaps I can remember just
enough for me to be OK with it.
The first session was gentle as she seemed so fragile, and it allowed
her to feel safe to explore further. When it was time for Angela's
second session she had remembered a situation from her childhood
wherein she remembered waking up in bed with a man on top of her. She
tried to scream but he had his hand over her mouth. As she recounted
this situation she only saw it happening from the back. She couldn't
recall faces, or hear any sounds. She described it as if she was in a
tunnel. She was at a level of intensity of 10 out of 10 as she told
me this much. We tapped.
This man is on top of me, I am so afraid.
I can't breathe.
Where's my mother?
I'm so scared and hurting.
EFT decreased the intensity of this situation, and she was so
surprised to be able to articulate it. She was very sure there were
other situations of abuse, but could not recall them. When she tried
she started to get panicky. The pain in her arm and shoulder had gone
down to about a 4 on a scale of 0 to 10.
During the next session, Angela had remembered another part of her
trauma. This time she was able to hear words and sounds, and have
flashes of seeing their faces. She had recalled an attack in a
bedroom with her cousin and his friend. The cousin was babysitting
Angela and her sister. Angela was eight and her sister was five. She
remembered one of them holding her arms as the other one molested
her. Again hands were over her face smothering her screams. They
also told her that if she told anyone they would really hurt her.
As she recounted this episode the pain in her arm and shoulder went up
to a 10, and her breathing was very shallow. We tapped.
I'm so little and afraid and I don't know why they are doing this to
me.
No one's helping me.
I'm so scared.
I want to hit him and get him off me.
I don't want to carry these memories with me.
I want to let go of this fear.
I'm sick to my stomach and I can't breathe.
Get off me and leave me alone, I'm just a little girl.
I hate you.
I want to let this go.
I want to hit you.
I can't breathe.
But that happened a long time ago.
It was bad enough that it happened then, without me carrying it with
me all these years.
Perhaps the pain in my arm is connected with the pain of being
violated and not being able to hit and protect myself.
I don't want Andy (cousin) in my arm.
I don't want painful memories in my arm or anywhere in my psyche.
I want to detach from these traumatic memories.
It's true it happened, but it's time to let it go.
It's over now.
I can begin healing myself.
The pain in Angela's arm was down from a 10 to a 2. In our next
session Angela was furious, she said she had been angry all week
particularly at her mother. She remembered going to her mother crying
and shaking, to tell her what had happened. She was so scared because
of her cousin's threats, but she did it anyway. Her mother told her
to stop making up stories and to go and play. Her arm was at a 10
again and during the week she had had another panic attack. The
mother was physically abused by Angela's father and was very afraid
and ineffectual. We tapped.
Even though my mother didn't save me from the bad men, I can still
learn to love and accept myself anyway. (She couldn't say I love and
accept myself.)
I feel so betrayed.
My mother is meant to protect me, and she didn't.
I understand even though my mother was meant to protect me, she
couldn't even protect herself from her own husband.
My mother was damaged.
She didn't know how to be a good mother.
I know she loved me the best she could.
She lived in fear and was constantly abused.
I understand this intellectually but not emotionally.
I'd like to be able to forgive her for not being the way I want her to
be.
I can't forgive her.
Perhaps I can.
No I can't.
It would be a release for me if I could.
It may be possible, but either way I'm quite wonderful anyway.
I am ready to be at peace with this situation.
The pain was down and she was relaxed and breathing well. Next we did
the movie technique on different situations of molestation that had
surfaced. I had her tap as she recounted the feeling of being
smothered and not able to breath and wanting to strike out as she
relived the experience. When the intensity peaked we tapped on that
particular part. After about 15 minutes, it was amazing to hear the
difference in the way she recounted detailed accounts of abuse. Her
emotional intensity went down on every instance to a level between 0
and 1. Her arm and shoulder pain were gone!
In her next session she mentioned that she had not experienced any
breathing problems, and could hardly be bothered to think about the
molestations. She said it just wasn't important any more. She still
had some anger at her mother and of course at her father. We tapped
on both parents until she could forgive them for not being "perfect."
She recognized they were very damaged and actually felt sorry for them
She has been pain free and panic free for over 4 months now. Once
again EFT changes a life.
Love and Light,
Aileen Nobles
.........................
Posted by JP |
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| vale |
| Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 2:05 pm |
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x-no-archive:yes
That's really wierd because I just wrote to a friend last night and
told him I wasn't sure if I was suicidal anymore or not because I
hardly ever think or care about all the multitude of things that
happened to me, like:
the abandonment by my mother, emotional and physical abuse, the
occurences of molestation in different homes, possibly seeing people
and animals murdered and hearing about murder, being raped and
strangled I don't know how many times, being imprisoned for being
abused, different men trying to rape/kill me or cut me up into pieces
just because they are psychos or maybe its me (that's still up for
debate whether God put an X on my back), abuse or negligance by the
medical profession and by the police department, so many things I
don't have the time to think of because I have to go make dinner now.
And oh I almost forgot I have a life threatening illness. At least
one of those.
So, maybe its good that I am so detached emotionally. I can save
money because I don't have to join a program or buy a DVD to learn how
to do it, it just comes naturally for me! Yay me!
And I know how to breath on the rare occasions when I do happen to
think of these things and they make me blue. I hyperventilate!
Life just goes on and it forces you to go along with it.
You have to think of me not as a victim though because I did sidestep
or survive all of these things and some survival things nature threw
at me too. I have a kick ass side of me that won't quit. (Sometimes I
wish it would) I have evolved into something else now, and I am proud
that I don't need your help or anyone else's help anymore.
I am not afraid of life, I am not afraid of death. Make of that what
you like. But I don't need what you have to sell. I am not saying
what you are selling doesn't work for some but it's not for me and I
would guess it's not for many other people here either. A good
salesman knows when to sell and also knows when to walk away. |
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| Day Brown |
| Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 7:20 pm |
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Bourchard's longitudinal studies of identical twins adopted out at
birth and raised by different families shows that whatever the effect
of parental abuse or nurture, later on in adulthood, people become who
they were meant to be determined by their DNA.
Whatever the effect of parenting, good or bad, by the mid twenties, it
fades. People abandon the religions they were raised in and identical
twins will pick similar cosmologies. The similarities are often quite
spooky. |
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| Pixie |
| Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 7:47 pm |
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On Mar 12, 5:20 am, Day Brown <daybr...@hughes.net> wrote:
Quote: Bourchard's longitudinal studies of identical twins adopted out at
birth and raised by different families shows that whatever the effect
of parental abuse or nurture, later on in adulthood, people become who
they were meant to be determined by their DNA.
Whatever the effect of parenting, good or bad, by the mid twenties, it
fades. People abandon the religions they were raised in and identical
twins will pick similar cosmologies. The similarities are often quite
spooky.
can you give a reference to that study about, quote:
Quote: whatever the effect
of parental abuse or nurture, later on in adulthood, people become who
they were meant to be determined by their DNA??
It makes it sound that abuse and environment has nothing to do with
how people "turn out" which I do not think is true, after all, look at
all the seemingly normal people that went off to fight in Vietnam or
whatever that came back rather fucked up. Clearly if they were not
exposed to *that* environment they would not have "turned out" that
way... |
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