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Hobby Forum Index » Humor » OJ Simpson guilty on all charges in robbery of his...
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| _Doug... |
 Posted: Tue Oct 07, 2008 11:32 pm |
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After 13 years since the 1995 brutal slashing murder of his ex-wife Nicole
and her, ahem, "friend" whats-his-name, OJ "Onto Joliet"* Simpson was
finally cleared of the (in the opinion of Judge Retort) ridiculously trumped
up - fabricated even! - charge of robbery.
The robbery took place at a nearby soup kitchen, where OJ stole the knife
that was subsequently seen to never leave his side over the next 13 years.
The knife was first seen by the American public on top of that white Ford
Bronco as OJ drove all around Los Angeles, back in '95, with TV helicopters
following. He finally stopped, after running out of gas, and explained that
he was just looking for his beloved knife.
The knife was next seen by the American public sticking out of Nicole's
"friend's" neck in a home movie during the infamous court trial, and also
seen in that famous McGruder film sticking out of JFK's neck, and seen over
and over in every famous lifeless neck over the last 13 years. And, finally
seen for the last time in a Las Vegas motel room sticking out of two necks
of OJ's two buddies found pinned to the wall by it.
Families of these last two victims suggest that Las Vegas police
over-emphasized the focus on the robbery of OJ's knife and should have
pressed for murder charges. However, these were quickly dismissed by JUDGE
ITO at the beginning of the trial after OJ's lawyer convinced him that it
was an obvious suicide.
Coincidentally, it was the same judge who presided over the Nicole/"friend"
stabbing trial -- said judge reportedly next off to Washington to preside
over recent Wall Street FannyMae FreddieMac wrongdoings.
* Joliet Hyatt Regency Correctional Apartments, Illinois -- OJ's upcoming
new living quarters.
------------------------------------------------
More news spoofs at.
http://www.JudgeRetort.com
Free spoof of DrudgeReport.com and the news.
* The home of political corruptness. *
Tell friends about JudgeRetort.com |
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